Calabasses

CALABASAS UNIVERSITY CUM LOUD

CUM LOUD

Syllabuttus: Get F’d with Knowledge

I Passed With Flying Colors (And a G-String)

Mandatory Oral Exams — No Hands Allowed

Graduated Top of Her Ass

Lectures Include Positions 101, Wet 201, and Advanced Spankonomics

We Don’t Cram for Finals — We Just Get Crammed

Booty Calls Accepted as Extra Credit

The Only Dress Code Is No Underwear

CU—We Take It From Behind...the Campus

Majoring in Backology, Minoring in Twerking

Class of Thick '24

CU — Our Mascot Is Just One Giant Peach

Welcome to the ASS-thletic Department

No Books, Just Booty

Dean's List? More Like Thicc List.

Our Motto: Veni, Vidi, Vici...Vibrated.

Cum Loud

Stretch Marks Are Student Loans for Bad Bitches

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